You Know You

Ever been told that you’re the one who knows yourself best? That you should listen to your instincts and go with your gut and all that?

Hearing and saying these things is one thing, but actually following it in your everyday life can be tricky… you quickly forget and start questioning yourself. Here’s why I recently realized how important this is.

As you all know, I have Familial Dysautonomia (F.D.), and with that comes a few things that affect my everyday life. One of these things is a feeding tube (peg-tube)… more of a preventative thing right now, but may come in handy one day in the future. I promise, I will try to make this post as non-disturbing as possible, avoiding the ‘TMI’ reaction you may get otherwise. So, this g-tube… had this type for a few years… have had issues with it lately. The peg-tube I’m talking about here is the one on the left. Before this, I had the button (on the right) for about 20 years. Whenever I thought back to these days, I seemed to remember a lack of hassles. Was it just me, or was there some truth to this? Maybe this was just wishful thinking? Maybe I was remembering things wrong? I mean, this one little change couldn’t fix everything, could it?

I asked doctors… either they looked at me as if I was an alien, or they simply dismissed it and that was that. Okay, I thought, that was my answer… my memories were misleading me. But just in case, I thought I’d look into it, I mean even my parents thought I could be right. Thus came the Google-ing.

Long story short, after so many months of hesitating and wondering, I figured what the heck? I’d give it a try. I had gotten the measurements I needed, so I picked up the phone and ordered myself one of these Mic-key buttons, as they call them. There it was… officially ordered. I decided I wouldn’t let myself be too hopeful, because for all I knew, it may not fit… it may be the wrong one… I mean anything could happen, right?

But, then… BAM, my problems were solved! Now with this button, I am back to normal… back to what I knew would work. This is where that ‘listening to yourself’ spiel comes in. I am now finally starting to trust myself… I know my own body way better than any doctor or nurse. This Mic-key button worked for me for over 20 years, tried and true. Now, years later, it works again.

Next time, I shall trust myself a little more, and hopefully this post will show you that you can do the same.